When I was growing up, a dysfunctional family seemed to be the norm. It was reflected in our movies and our TV shows so it was almost safe to assume that everyone in our generation was messed up.

In my particular context, we were raised by the maids and our parents were never around. And when they were, we were invisible.

I remember walking outside the Ateneo with one of my best friends, repeatedly saying to ourselves, “I am special. I am special.” When we came across some street children, we whispered to them with the same fervor, “You are special. You are special,” in the hopes of sparing them the angst that plagued us.

Fast forward to 2014, on my first play date with Lily. We had settled in for the night and I put on “Annie, the Musical”. I was just about to belt out, “Betcha he reads. Betcha she sews. Maybe she’s made me a closet of clothes,” when Lily asked, perplexed, “Where are their parents?” I was flabbergasted. Here was a child who didn’t understand the concept of an absentee parent! I wasn’t sure what to say. I mumbled something about their parents possibly being dead or unable to take care of their children.

Enter stage right, Miss Hannigan.

Lily: “Is she a good person?”

I groaned. How was I going to explain that these children without any parents were left in the care of a woman who despised them? All I could do was shake my head no.

After we had been watching for some time and Lily had gotten into the plot and the music, I stopped the movie for a while. “Do you have any questions,” I asked, troubled. “Should I be explaining anything to you?”

“No,” she assured me, and I figured I’d let her parents deal with the aftermath.

Before we went to sleep, Lily wanted a hug. “What??? Why,” I eyed her suspiciously. The concept was totally alien to me. Bear in mind that I think of Lily as my playmate and I certainly never hugged any of my playmates before going to sleep. Come to think of it, I never really hugged my parents either, until much later on, of course. Even saying “I love you” to me was something that took some getting used to.

As you may have guessed, my boyfriends found me quite odd.