I’ve been doing really well with my Paleo diet. I haven’t really had too many cheat days. But, as I said before, if I’m going to cheat, I’ll do it with dairy or sugar, maybe even – gasp! – rice. Anything but wheat and gluten. If the naysayers are to be believed, wheat and gluten are responsible for everything that is wrong with this world, including Justin Bieber.

Except that, I was looking through a food blog recently and it occured to me that wheat (and, by extension, gluten) is responsible for most everything that is good in this world. That’s everything in a bakery, Oreos, cookie dough ice cream, fried chicken, ham and cheese sandwiches, pizza, meat pies, BEER. It’s rather cruel, really. I’ve oft repeated the line “The best things in life are illegal, immoral or fattening,” and it would be funny, if it weren’t so absofuckinglutely true. For instance, why can’t zucchini be addicting? Why must bitter gourd taste vile? Why is it the good stuff that’s always bad??? (Why, ye cruel gods, why???)

Because of this strict no-wheat/gluten rule, I’ve had to do more research on what alcoholic drinks I can have.

FYI, ALL distilled drinks are gluten-free, unless gluten flavors were added afterwards. That includes vodka. Hooray! Although there have been reports of people claiming sensitivity to alcohol made from grain, technically, it’s not supposed to happen. I’ll go with science on this one, thank you. (Beer is still out because it is brewed and not distilled. Boo!)

Unfortunately, while most drinks are gluten-free, they are not wheat free. Here’s a list of alcohol made from wheat. Unfortunately, it includes vodka. (Noooooo!!!) But I’d like to think (and I could be wrong here) that the main objection to wheat is gluten so with the gluten component removed, then everything should be back to being hunky dory. As I said, I could be wrong, but I do love vodka.

I have no idea what magazine this is from or if it’s true or not – but I believe it! 😉

I’m not sure how long I can keep this up. On one hand, I feel really good. On the other, I’m going to France, the land of baguettes, croissants and crepes! How could I possibly resist???

I’ll take it one day at a time.

I’m still intermittent fasting but I’m not too strict about it. I have lunch and dinner with Nicolas when he’s here on the weekends. If I’m hungover, I won’t hesitate to ask for a big bacon and scrambled eggs breakfast, as I did before it was even 6 AM this morning. If I need something sweet, I’ll have a banana (or ten). I don’t really need to lose any more weight and am quite happy where I’m at now.

What I really have to do is stop smoking. Not only because when I smoke, I smoke like a chimney, but also because it keeps me awake. For instance, yesterday, I had a very long, boozey lunch that turned into 1 AM at a sleazy bar somewhere. At 3 AM, I was still ordering stuff from Etsy. (I know. My credit card is screaming for an intervention.) By 5:30, I was awake and ready for bacon and eggs. I’ve actually been getting more sleep now but, when I’ve been smoking a lot, I find it difficult to get any decent rest. Unfortunately, I don’t think I’m ready to quit again. Not just yet.