A few weeks ago, Johnny, my swimming instructor, invited me to join him for lunch. He told me about this place where he could get fresh oysters by the bucket. Although I never acquired a taste for oysters, I was eager to see a different side of Cebu, so I said yes. We got on his motorbike and sweltered under an unforgiving sun towards Consolacion, about 12 kilometers from Cebu City.

We pulled up outside Redwood Subdivision, which was, clearly, still under construction. Johnny instructed me to get off the bike so that he could park it. I was puzzled.

“The restaurant is in there?”

We walked through the subdivision. “You know, even if I had money, I wouldn’t live here,” Johnny said. “There wouldn’t be any privacy.” He pointed at the rows of shoe-box apartments. For a man who slept sitting up in a chair at a sports bar, I had to admire his ability to remain discerning.

At the edge of the property – because this is the Philippines and because we can – there were mangroves and, in the water, was a hut.

“That’s Timyong’s Restaurant.”

Of course it is.

I think it says “Please put the empty oyster shells in the bucket.”

It was all a bit surreal, but then I saw the oysters and got excited about the food.

We ended up with fried tilapia and grilled squid.

I thought Timyong’s clientele was limited to Redwood’s construction workers but, later on, as we were leaving, more people showed up, including a small group of well-heeled Cebuanos.

Sinugba! (Check out the stuffing of the bangus – a.k.a. milkfish.) Yummmmm!

Cebu is the land of sinugba. Sugba means “to grill” and sinugba refers to anything that is grilled. According to Johnny, when the tourists started flocking to the sugbahan places in Mactan, that jacked up prices, so that the locals sought out more out of the way places like Timyong’s, which offer the same fare at prices Cebuanos are more comfortable with.

This is how we do it, baby! Philippine-style. We eat with our hands. Although, I, eventually, asked for a fork and spoon. That’s rice wrapped in coconut leaves; it’s called puso.

As I was contemplating ordering the pork, storm clouds started brewing and, since we had gotten there on a bike, Johnny hurried us home. I took precautionary measures and wrapped everything I had in plastic. Johnny – he, who carries three mobile phones – was convinced he could dodge the rain. Then it was all very “Independence Day”, with him trying to outrun the rain clouds. Whenever we’d see it pouring down in the distance, he’d take another road and avoid it. He dropped me off at the corner of my street without getting a single drop of rain on us. Very impressive.

Now I know of a hidden mangrove place where oysters grow and that, in Cebu, it is possible to outrun the rain.